So I set off on the biggest adventure of my young life in less than two days. And right about now I have that feeling that I have so much to do… that I don’t want to do anything. I look at my to-do list and the don’t-forget list and my backpack just staring right back at me, and all I want to do is binge-watch Netflix and get lost in Pinterest.
I never realized how quickly this moment would arrive. First of all, when I started planning this trip almost 10 months ago, I imagined my life a lot differently. I’d have everything booked and my backpack packed at least a month in advance. I’d be perfectly ready. I’d also still be with my (ex)boyfriend, madly in love and spending every last second with him that I could.
Yeah, right. That didn’t happen.
As life slowly started getting in the way of my perfect plans, I had to constantly alter my expectations. The itinerary changed a few times, I added a few extra days here and there for myself as I did more and more research. My best friend from Germany, who had planned to fly home with me at the end of my trip in summer, decided to come in January instead. And then my love life came to an unexpected and abrupt end. I had so many different options and decisions to make that I was overwhelmed. Now that I didn’t have anyone to come home to or with, did I even want to come home at all?
That question probed my mind for months, and it still does, even though I have made my decision. Nonetheless, everything became more complicated.
After a lot of contemplation I decided not to book everything in advance. I decided instead to splurge on a 3-month continuous Eurail pass and see where my heart would lead me.
Me 10 months ago would be horrified. My first time backpacking around Europe with no daily schedule? No booked hostels or set itinerary? But since then, with all of the crap life has been throwing me, I feel a lot more confident that I can handle this. And more than that, I feel a lot more free, which is how backpacking should be, right?
I’m still scared. I’m terrified, actually. But something in the universe is telling me that I need to do this. I’ve always been fiercely independent, but my fear of being alone has always kept me sheltered from that. Now is my time to show myself what I am capable of.
It’s my time to follow my gypsy feet.